Summer rolls on. It has been such a wonderful season here. Before last week, we had only one 90 degree day! It was in the 90s most of last week, but I'm following a strictly-no-complaints-allowed policy. As I see it, you can only pick one season to complain about, and here in Chicago you are crazy if you choose to whine about the beautiful, sunshiney summer instead of the desolate, soul-sucking winter.

I want your heart to be set upon me, to want me, as mine is set upon wanting you. (Tennyson)

I was in Montana last weekend for my cousin's wedding. It was a beautiful time together with family and a wonderful event. I had the chance to spend some time with family that I hadn't seen in about six years, and the opportunity to meet some future family members-in-law. (Everyone's getting married now. "When will we be attending a wedding for you, David?") We spent a day inside Yellowstone National Park, did a little hiking, and I got to play with my niece Ellie a little bit, too. I also had the chance to reflect a little on the emergence of a very strong line of females in the Bennett family. My cousin's mother was quite the dominant force at the wedding, and is not just a bit reminiscent (personality-wise) of my sister Amy. My cousin's bride is just like his mother, and my dearly departed Grandma's memory was often referenced. Now young Ellie is making her presence and capable lungs often and loudly heard. It was a long weekend, in the sense that sometimes when I am with family I feel every minute acutely, but a good weekend, too.

The future has got me worried, such awful thoughts.
My head is a carousel of pictures.
The spinning never stops.
I just want someone to walk in front
and I'll follow the leader...
But if everything that happens is supposed to be
and it is predetermined, can't change your destiny,
Then I guess I'll just keep moving, someday, maybe, I'll get to where I'm going... (Bright Eyes)

The best thing that I did for myself this summer is purchasing a window-unit air conditioner. The last time I lived here in Chicago I sweated the summer away thinking that I was saving so much money by not being a bourgeois A/C pig. Even now that I have it, I don't need to use it that much, and it is pretty energy efficient when I run it, I guess. I was looking forward, with a bit of trepidation, to seeing how much my power bill would go up though. Yesterday I received the bill, and it is a full $3 more expensive than last month. Well worth it.

Well darkness has a hunger that's insatiable
And lightness has a call that's hard to hear
I wrap my fear around me like a blanket
I sailed my ship of safety till I sank it... (Indigo Girls)

I went to another movie-in-the-park last week: All About Eve. It was really good! I can recommend it highly, especially if you enjoy older movies or might like a glimpse at the state of feminism in the early 1950s. Tuesday night I'm hoping to crash a Lucinda Williams concert downtown. It is at a lakefront amphitheater, so I'm gonna try to chill on the beach or grass nearby and catch whatever sonic rays of goodness I can.

I am weary of you, my lover. I am weary of your continual blind selfishness; nearly pure you are in your selfishness, like a small child or idiot savant, unable to feel what another person is feeling, unable to understand or live the Golden Rule. (The Barth)

Currently Listening To:
Arcade Fire, Iron and Wine, and Nickel Creek

Saca in the Wind

My awesome "free"/"borrowed" internet is down at home, so I'm arm-twisted into packing up my baby and its umbilical cord and buying a $4 cup of tea for a couple hours of the wifi commodity that used to be free and easy, on demand. What a bummer!

I saw two things in the last 24 hours that were of note to me.

1 - Last night, on a bus ride home, I saw an otherwise sane-appearing girl with a broom, nudging one of those rolling two-shelf TV carts down the sidewalk. Sweep, roll. Sweep, roll. It was like a parody of that awful Canadian winter sport curling. Or a sly commentary on TV abuse and TV's abuse.

Side note, I was riding the bus home from Most Awesome Summer Event Ever: an outdoor movie showing of "Hairspray" at one of the northside lake beaches. It was also the Gayest Event I've Ever Attended, and I'm including Lilith Fair. Think about it, though: movie musical, pride week, Zac Efron. Who's surprised the gays came out in droves?

2 - This morning before work, while waiting to cross a street, a short bus drove by. In the bus's very last row, two arms raised high above his head, fingers clinging to the window's top, his face pressed against the glass with mouth agape, a special boy. He, I think, was enjoying the ride. His pose was dramatic. He made me smile.

Currently Netflixing:
Freaks and Geeks

Who Knew

I've never really gotten too comfortable with this blog. I don't post here often, so I guess that I don't remember to mention the more colorful inanities that give life that wonderful lived-in feel.

Last week was concert week. We saw Death Cab for Cutie on Tuesday at Millennium Park in the heart of beautiful downtown Chicago. It is a pretty cool venue, but maybe not perfect for a more introspective-ish alternative band like Death Cab.



Here is a picture from the concert that proves that I have two - 2! - friends in Chicago. They are married, and they are about to have a baby just like all the rest of you suckers, but I'm still counting them and counting them separately. Maybe after Lucy comes I'll be able to say that I have three - 3! - friends here. Kyle and Melissa are the coolest. Oh yeah, we went to a James Taylor concert on Friday also, but I didn't take any pictures there.



Now that I'm living in this strange foreign land, I wanted to show you a picture of some canned food that I found in my local import store the other day. How ribald! How outrageous! How microwaveable?!?!



I've been struggling with forgiveness lately. More specifically if or how to create it. In the midst of the complexity and confusion that is a serious romantic relationship arose a situation that I am finding incredibly difficult to deal with. I'm not sure if I can forgive; I'm not sure if I want to forgive. I know that in simpler instances I have been able to choose forgiveness, but that doesn't seem to be an option here. I'm at a bit of an impasse, I guess. The hurt and bitterness grow. Mostly hurt.

Currently Just Watched:
Once

Bubble

Not a...




Riding the bus home from work the other night. I plopped my butt down in this seat and was immediately taken with the hundred little air bubbles trapped underneath the carelessly applied window tinting beside me. It is a 20 minute ride home, so I let my mind wander. I liked how I could imagine being on an underwater bus, even though the glug-glug aquarium sounds were only in my head. Or how the neighborhoods that we were crawling and lurching through might have been filled with invisible children blowing bubbles: tiny bubbles, large bubbles, siamese twin bubbles fusing and separating. I tried to capture some interesting photos of the bubbles with my phone, but succeeded mostly in just totally confusing the focus and making some fun blurs over the iconery of a couple of deplorable chain stores.









A view of downtown from where the sidewalk of my neighborhood street ends. The weather this time of year reminds me that summer is the only reason that anyone lives in Chicago. Why don't you come for a visit?




Currently Watching
Into the Wild which gets ***** A+ "Two Thumbs Up" from me

Saugatuck, Memorial Day Weekend

Kevin and I took a little trip across Lake Michigan last weekend for the long holiday. We stayed in one of those picturesque little waterfront villages where affluent bed-and-breakfast 50somethings just love to untuck their shirts. It was great.



We took a room at the Shangrai-La Hotel where our hosts, the Patels, had done just a bang-up job on the shower tile. I took pictures because I hope to replicate it one day in a home of my own.



We hung out on the village green's grass, listened to some gazebo bar band play Jimmy Buffet, and congratulated ourselves on 3 years minus 10 days of togetherness.







We spent a day at Lake Michigan's nicest beach. That's not as easy a title to win as you might think, smartasses. It was too windy to take off your shirt and tan, but perfect kite flying weather. My towel was red, white, and blue to honor our nation's war dead.



A sign.



A sunset.

A very nice getaway.


Currently Listening to
Death Cab for Cutie Narrow Stairs