India, Terror, Consequence, Disillusionment, Frailty, Silence

Fridays are just, wow, so good now. I went ice skating again, and for the last time, this afternoon after work. Just when I was getting pretty good, season's over! And by "good" I mean I didn't fall down at all. Go me!

I had to return the microwave that my parents got me for Christmas to Target last week. The door latch was stubborn, and I wasn't taking any guff. I thought I would upgrade to something a little more powerful, too, like something that didn't take 6 minutes for a bag of popcorn. Being the ridiculously thorough and thrifty shopper that I am, I decided to wait for a new week and a new sale before getting a replacement. I AM STARVING. I have managed, spoiled brat, to live almost my entire life with one of these wonderful, quick-witted/watted devices always at my beck and call. This week I've visited both of our local Target stores, trying to get plugged in again now that a model that I like is on sale. Sold out, of course. But cereal for dinner is always a winner.

I've been feeling lots of jealousy lately. That is a bad emotion; I can sense its amoeba movements, its pseudopods trying to package little parts of my soul into vacuoles for slow digestion. I need those parts of my soul, the outer edge. The tough stuff, protection. Back, jealousy! Back!

Got my first paycheck today. Painfully small.

I wish that Hillary Clinton would just go away. She is a very unfortunate person, and I think that she is supremely selfish. Selfishness really bothers me. It is my belief that many, or most, of the world's, and my world's, problems are caused by selfishness. In a bit of deconstructionist irony, though, I see selfishness everywhere all day long, and call it such, mostly in my mind. That makes me a judgmental person, which is a very selfish way to live, too. I am aware of my selfishness, though. And other people's, too.

This morning as I was ascending to work, I saw on the elevator TV a picture of the space house on Signal Mountain and a blurb that said it is going to be auctioned off tomorrow! If you aren't from Chattanooga, that makes no sense at all and you don't care, which I thought also made it kind of a weird thing to be on the Chicago elevator TV channel with all the stock quotes and business news and weather forecasts. But I couldn't help myself, I had to say, "Hey! That's in my hometown!" And this guy says to me, "Have you seen that house before?" And I was like, "Yeah, it is pretty well-known in Chattanooga." And this girl was like, "You're from Chatterblurg-huh?" And I was like, "Um, yeah."

On Wednesday morning I listened to Alanis on the train to work. Something about it made me so happy, just bursting with happiness. I smiled so much that morning, at strangers, at fellow commuters; it felt like I absolutely HAD to be happy. The sun, and the fact that I could take off my gloves and hat in the train, and the music that meant something, that carried actual thoughts and feelings and grown-up words, emotions ohmygosh, and I wrote her a Thank You note in my head that I will never send because fan mail? No.

Currently Watching:
Scrubs, Season 2