Life at an Intersection

Chicago Phoenix, indemnity bonds, journaling, really really really want a zigazig ah, travel, books, travel books, relationships, values. It is hard to pinpoint precisely, but I'd say about 82% of what you read here is true. The rest is fictional nonfiction.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Tibet, Taiwan, Tyrants


Dear Chinese Communist Party,

Fuck you.

No Love,


Did anyone else catch the irony of the headline from China this morning: "China on Wednesday strongly protested the U.S. military's mistaken delivery to Taiwan of intercontinental ballistic missile electrical fuses,"? China won't let the people of Tibet hold a peaceful, non-violent protest in their own land, cracking down in an incredibly violent, out-of-proportion, heavy-handed manner. But their evil, tyrannical, land-grabbing government feels self-righteous enough to file a protest and make demands of two other autonomous governments: "Qin again demanded an end to such weapons sales and military-to-military contacts between Washington and Taipei in order to 'avoid damaging peace and stability in the Taiwan Strait and the healthy development of China-U.S. relations.'" I wish Washington would have the balls to say to China what I just did - fuck you, evil bastards. Take your Dollar Tree junk and your shoes that give me blisters and shove them up your rice evacuation hole.

I used quotes from this AP story.

Currently Listening:
Saturday Nights & Sunday Mornings by Counting Crows

Saturday, March 22, 2008



Back in January, after the big move and starting to get settled, I sent out a lot of resumes. Last Friday I got a response from one of those, a small community bank called me and wanted to set up an interview. I said okay, because why not, really? I finished my training at Moral Bank W on Tuesday, worked in my branch on Wednesday, and had an interview at Community Bank N on Thursday. After asking me about 3 questions, the human resources lady at Community Bank N offered me a job.

They offered me a comparable amount of salary and benefits to Moral Bank W, the chance to escape the e-vile clutches of an overlarge corporation, the opportunity to do more of the tasks and operations things that I enjoy when working in a bank, better prospects for promotions and raises, and a just-plain-better community friendly-vibe feeling.

So I accepted. I went over to Moral Bank W on Thursday afternoon and quit. I feel just a little bad, just a twinge of regret, but not so much. If someone there had been really nice, very encouraging, made me feel really welcome, then I would truly have felt bad about quitting so quickly. But that wasn't the reality. The truth is that I had no peers there, in the sense that I was the lowest of the low on the branch ladder, and I didn't enjoy the atmosphere that the bank manager created when she was there or the air of authority that she seems to work hard at broadcasting.

Anyway, blah blah, the point of the story is that I have a new job! I'm excited about this new company, and I start another two weeks of training on Monday. After that I will find out at which of their 26 branches I will be working.


Last night, in lieu of attending a Good Friday church service, I went to the movies; the only appropriate title for the date, of course, was Atonement. I liked this movie much. It was the quietest movie that I have seen in a while, and very slow and patient as well. It captured my attention and held me. It makes sense that the movie is paced thusly, because there isn't actually a whole lot of plot involved. Lots of alternate perspective shots, lots of fading in and out of focus, lots of captured facial expressions. I read the book several years ago, 2003 if I remember correctly, and the film follows it very faithfully, so no surprises. A beautiful, romantic story.


It snowed several inches yesterday, the supposed first day of Spring. Trudging through the new-fallen snow, stepping in street corner slush up to my ankles, wind blowing tiny ice pellets into my eyes, big wet flakes soaking my gloves in late March: it wounds the spirit.

Currently Reading:
The End by Lemony Snicket

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Simple Truths


In church this morning, we sang "This is My Father's World," and I remembered how much I like that hymn. Here's my favorite verse:

This is my Father’s world, why should my heart be sad?
The Lord is King, let the heavens ring.
God reigns, let the earth be glad.

Simple, but just right.

Friday, March 14, 2008

India, Terror, Consequence, Disillusionment, Frailty, Silence

Fridays are just, wow, so good now. I went ice skating again, and for the last time, this afternoon after work. Just when I was getting pretty good, season's over! And by "good" I mean I didn't fall down at all. Go me!

I had to return the microwave that my parents got me for Christmas to Target last week. The door latch was stubborn, and I wasn't taking any guff. I thought I would upgrade to something a little more powerful, too, like something that didn't take 6 minutes for a bag of popcorn. Being the ridiculously thorough and thrifty shopper that I am, I decided to wait for a new week and a new sale before getting a replacement. I AM STARVING. I have managed, spoiled brat, to live almost my entire life with one of these wonderful, quick-witted/watted devices always at my beck and call. This week I've visited both of our local Target stores, trying to get plugged in again now that a model that I like is on sale. Sold out, of course. But cereal for dinner is always a winner.

I've been feeling lots of jealousy lately. That is a bad emotion; I can sense its amoeba movements, its pseudopods trying to package little parts of my soul into vacuoles for slow digestion. I need those parts of my soul, the outer edge. The tough stuff, protection. Back, jealousy! Back!

Got my first paycheck today. Painfully small.

I wish that Hillary Clinton would just go away. She is a very unfortunate person, and I think that she is supremely selfish. Selfishness really bothers me. It is my belief that many, or most, of the world's, and my world's, problems are caused by selfishness. In a bit of deconstructionist irony, though, I see selfishness everywhere all day long, and call it such, mostly in my mind. That makes me a judgmental person, which is a very selfish way to live, too. I am aware of my selfishness, though. And other people's, too.

This morning as I was ascending to work, I saw on the elevator TV a picture of the space house on Signal Mountain and a blurb that said it is going to be auctioned off tomorrow! If you aren't from Chattanooga, that makes no sense at all and you don't care, which I thought also made it kind of a weird thing to be on the Chicago elevator TV channel with all the stock quotes and business news and weather forecasts. But I couldn't help myself, I had to say, "Hey! That's in my hometown!" And this guy says to me, "Have you seen that house before?" And I was like, "Yeah, it is pretty well-known in Chattanooga." And this girl was like, "You're from Chatterblurg-huh?" And I was like, "Um, yeah."

On Wednesday morning I listened to Alanis on the train to work. Something about it made me so happy, just bursting with happiness. I smiled so much that morning, at strangers, at fellow commuters; it felt like I absolutely HAD to be happy. The sun, and the fact that I could take off my gloves and hat in the train, and the music that meant something, that carried actual thoughts and feelings and grown-up words, emotions ohmygosh, and I wrote her a Thank You note in my head that I will never send because fan mail? No.

Currently Watching:
Scrubs, Season 2

Friday, March 7, 2008

Call Ahead


Delighted: Walking from the train station to the bus stop on my way home this evening, glancing in the window of a little, inauspicious diner, seeing the handsome couple (tousled hair, complimentary but not matching wool crewneck sweaters, nervous perma-smiles), hands resting on thighs, perfect posture, both staring at their table-top menus. First date, blind date, friend-of-a-friend? You are doing fine, he likes you, just breathe and keep smiling. Not embarrassed to meet somewhere so cheap, unpretentious, and homey so early? How honest, how admirable in a sub-culture that values sexy and flash over substance and quality. May there be many more like you, with your humanness and lack of pretension.

Relieved: Maybe Friday night is only as much fun as you deserve, as much relief as your week has earned. Left Moral Bank W's corporate brainwashing center at 4 o'clock, rewarded self for small attempts at subjugating the dominant paradigm during return to 40-hour work week by going ice skating at the humble and adjacent Daley Plaza rink (slab?). Tranquil, nearly deserted until a group of five year-old little girls and their camcorder-toting Young City Moms converged for a class. Fled to Old Navy, purchased another jean jacket, employing the following reasoning: having a dark one, medium one, and light one means that no matter what wash is in style in a given year, I should have it covered. I should never have to buy another jean jacket ever again. Blue one, anyway. Caribou for coffee and a book. Espresso makes my legs tingle.

Sickened: The train, or at least the one particular area of the train where I had the misfortune of sitting this morning, smelled like vomit. Is it the man next to me? No, he's well-groomed, older, and reading one of the LGBTQQI papers. Is it someone behind me? Did I step in it? Is it on my shoes?

At home: Started thinking about the city today, how I interact with it, how I respond to it, how I think of it and me and us together. Decided that it is a relationship, oneself and the place where one lives. Analogous, at least.

Away from home: Sitting next to Chinese speakers, still thrilling, still intriguing, wishing that I was brave enough to talk to them and make friends, invite them over for a grapefruit green tea.

With plenty of nice moments and a couple of perfect ones, it was a good day.

Currently Reading:
The Time Traveler's Wife by Audrey Niffenegger

Sunday, March 2, 2008



Tomorrow I begin my new job at Moral Bank W. (((Which, you might have gathered, is not actually the name of my new employer. If you really want to know, I will be glad to tell you its/their name over a secure land-line telephone connection, now that our Brave! Courageous! and Tardy! Democratic Congress has decided that George W. Bush is no longer allowed to secretly listen to our phone calls.)))

I have a few fluttering butterflies, same old first day jitterbugs, but otherwise am convinced of the inconsequence, and thus lack of reason for nervousness, of this, my new short-term life task. A reason to get up in the morning? Yes. A reason for living? Barf, no, and a pox on you for even reading that question. We'll see how it goes, all the while hoping to stumble into something different, better, and worth all the complex shades of meaning that could be contained in the adjective good.


Liza is here visiting right now. It has been a very nice long weekend, a sort-of last hurrah, in a strictly not-final way. We have seen a couple of shows, eaten some very large muffins in an orderly, well-thought out process, watched a couple of movies, drank much coffee, and had some good conversations. She isn't feeling well at the moment, sinuses sleeping in the other room at this moment, so you can be a buddy and send her a smile when you read this.


As for other buddies, I had brunch with Michael Essington, future Legal Counselor to the (Great/Downtrodden) last weekend. It is always fun to see him, hear all of the latest, concoct some new conspiracy theories, and pick his brain about life in Chicago. Sounds like he is planning a return to Dallas for an internship this summer, so that's muy bien para el but minus one friend for me for the long, hot, festive months.


If anyone besides the Camerons and Liza actually look at this page, for whom this message is redundant, I would encourage you, yea verily exhort you, to check out the website, which is a very fun and easy way to get some good book recommendations and keep up with what your friends and lovers are reading at the moment. You can write little bitty or long winded reviews of books that you have loved and hated, or just give star ratings to books and authors that you have encountered along the way. I can think of lots of people that I would love to get recommendations from before I head off to the public library, but I don't necessarily want to bug them to join another **sigh** social networking site. At least this one is stalker- and bikinied girl-free.


A really cool commentary about how Barack Hussein Obama's name is a proud, American name.


Currently Watching:
High School Musical 2
(Don't knock it; it makes me happy.)

Twitter / Davie_St

Words That I'm Living By - 5/2/2010

Time, as I've known it
Doesn't take much time to pass by me
Minutes into days, turn into months
Turn into years, they hurry by me
But still I love to see the sun go down
And the world go around

Dreams full of promises
Hopes for the future, I've had many
Dreams I can't remember now
Hopes that I've forgotten,
faded memories
But still I love to see the sun go down
And the world go around

And I love to see the morning
as it steals across the sky
I love to remember and
I love to wonder why
And I hope that I'm around
so I can be there when I die
When I'm gone

I hope that you will think of me
In moments when you're happy and you're smiling
That the thought will comfort you
On cold and cloudy days
if you are crying
And that you'll love to see
the sun go down
And the world go around
And around and around

"Around and Around" by Mark Kozelek

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