The moving walkway at Midway Airport. It never, ever works. This might be a sad blog. Don't read it.
Do you know what I miss the most right now? I miss sharing life with someone. I miss the pronouns we and our and us. I actively avoid using them. Now I talk about my time in Taiwan, and when I went to Costa Rica, and the last time that I lived in Chicago. But I miss living life together, collaborating, consorting, and conspiring in tandem. There's something about being a pair that is really nice. Always having a buddy, a friend, a partner.
For the years after college I was a very independent guy, moving and travelling and living on my own. Making my own way, etc. It wasn't by choice, but it was my life, and I became deeply used to it. Honestly, I wasn't sure that I'd ever be able to be half of a couple after all of that time alone, that I could find a complement to my personality that would click into place. After being with Kevin for a while, though, I was happy to find that it was in fact very nice to share life with him, to look out for each other and help each other, and that this really worked for me and I loved it.
Perhaps I got too complacent with this nascent partnership. Perhaps that U mark that he got on his kindergarten report card for Sharing with Classmates was a harbinger of things to come. I know that I would do a zillion things differently if I could go back and do it all again, but this isn't a terribly profitable enterprise, this compulsive hindsight rehashing, and I'm trying to give it up.
All that I want to say today is that I miss living life together with him, and that I miss my buddy.
Currently Listening to:
The Damnwells, One Last Century
Download it free from Paste
Do you know what I miss the most right now? I miss sharing life with someone. I miss the pronouns we and our and us. I actively avoid using them. Now I talk about my time in Taiwan, and when I went to Costa Rica, and the last time that I lived in Chicago. But I miss living life together, collaborating, consorting, and conspiring in tandem. There's something about being a pair that is really nice. Always having a buddy, a friend, a partner.
For the years after college I was a very independent guy, moving and travelling and living on my own. Making my own way, etc. It wasn't by choice, but it was my life, and I became deeply used to it. Honestly, I wasn't sure that I'd ever be able to be half of a couple after all of that time alone, that I could find a complement to my personality that would click into place. After being with Kevin for a while, though, I was happy to find that it was in fact very nice to share life with him, to look out for each other and help each other, and that this really worked for me and I loved it.
Perhaps I got too complacent with this nascent partnership. Perhaps that U mark that he got on his kindergarten report card for Sharing with Classmates was a harbinger of things to come. I know that I would do a zillion things differently if I could go back and do it all again, but this isn't a terribly profitable enterprise, this compulsive hindsight rehashing, and I'm trying to give it up.
All that I want to say today is that I miss living life together with him, and that I miss my buddy.
Currently Listening to:
The Damnwells, One Last Century
Download it free from Paste
2 comments:
that was indeed a very sad blog:(
I hope your lunch was good. And the rest of the day after that.
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